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How to Help a Child With School: The 3 Rs

With the new year comes a new semester-and a fresh start for struggling students. Though every child’s needs are unique as they are, here are three points of wisdom to keep in mind while helping your child with school:

1. Relate- “We’ll never use this stuff” is a favorite expression among young students. A third grader barely thinks about next week, much less the next decade, when they’ll reap most of the benefits of their many years of schooling.

Knowing this, our first R is Relate: Relate the material that they’re learning to their immediate world, rather then trying to explain its long-term benefits.

With a little creativity, you can find real-world applications to almost any of their lessons. Multiplication tables? Have them sort and calculate the amount of money in a jar of coins. History or Science? Take them to a museum and let them give you a tour. Writing? Let them write hand-written letters to friends and relatives; grandparents especially enjoy receiving letters from their grandchildren. The possibilities are endless, and choose activities relevant to the unique interests and needs of your child. By helping them relate their schoolwork to the real world, you’ll reinforce their knowledge and motivate them to learn more.

2. Reframe- Like adults, children widely differ in their preferred modes of learning. Unfortunately, most schools are unable to cater to this diversity, putting some children at a serious disadvantage.

Popular models of learning styles broadly categorize them into three types: visual, auditory, and kinesthetic or tactile. Determine where your child falls by reviewing the characteristics of each or having them take a quiz. Then, take material they may struggle with and reframe it to suit their learning style.

Visual learners thrive on seeing conceptual material via writing and graphics. This can make it difficult for them to understand or pay attention to concepts that are taught primarily by lecture. If your child is a visual learner, encourage them to take notes in class and review them after school; give them colorful pens and highlighters so they can color-code and sketch information as they hear it. At home, they’ll find it helpful to create flashcards and study guides with interesting pictures and visual cues. Making visual representations of information, such as diagramming sentences or mapping out history events, also benefits visual learners.

Auditory learners absorb information well by hearing and discussing it. Modern classrooms are typically well-suited to this style, as most teachers use a lecturing technique. Consider having your child tape record lectures (with their teacher’s permission of course!) and review them at home. Ask your child to explain concepts to you or have them read out loud. Also know that for some auditory learners, background noise will actually help them study.

Kinesthetic or tactile learners learn best from hands-on activities, which can make it hard for them to sit still in a standard classroom setting. These students will greatly appreciate trips to museums and other real-world activities (see our first R: relate). They generally study best in short blocks and with other people. Ideally, they should study while engaging their hands, with activities such as role-playing or model making. A multimedia approach, combining visual and auditory elements, will also appeal to tactile learners.

3. Relax- Our last R is easier said than done, because dealing with a struggling student can undoubtedly be one of the biggest challenges of parenting, and one of the most complex. Academic difficulties can be caused by a myriad of factors including lack of motivation, low self-esteem, health issues, poor school quality, social influences, and many more.

That said, getting overly stressed out about your child’s academic performance is sure to backfire. Avoid negativity, such as threats, punishments, nagging, and expressions of worry. Remember, your end goal is to motivate your child to work hard in school from a sense of their personal pride and enjoyment, not fear or stress. Offer unwavering support and optimism, and consider hiring an outside tutor.

Finally, keep things in perspective. The vast majority of kids encounter a few rough patches in their academic careers, and some are simply better skilled in areas outside the classroom, such as athletics and arts. Unless your child has serious performance issues, your situation is most likely just a temporary blip – even though it may not feel that way at the time. Treat your child’s academic struggles as a positive challenge, and you’ll set an example that lasts much longer than one or two disappointing grades.

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