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Ten Healthy Ways to Remember a Deceased Loved One
Are you afraid that now with the funeral over and everyone has returned to their usual roles that your loved one will slowly be forgotten? Or, are you wondering what you can do to make it clear that the deceased is still a part of your family and always will be?
There are many things you can do that will honor the deceased and at the same time keep their memory alive. In many cases, the way you remember the person will be a source of wisdom and humor that can last for years and be an inspiration in life.
Here are ten ways to start showing love even if you are separated from your loved one.
1. When the time is right (and only you know when) tell your favorite story about the loved one. It could be a funny story or one that illustrates his character. Choose the right place and people to share the best with, and be careful to inject as a normal and natural extension of the conversation.
2. Periodically, use a favorite recipe that your loved one enjoyed eating or cooking. You can also serve his favorite dessert with a reminder of what the conversation was like when it was served.
3. Plant a memorial garden or a tree, bush, or flower that blooms every year and is called “Sarah’s Garden”, “Mary’s tree” or Joe’s plant. “Choose the items that were the favorites of your loved one. If possible. , put them in a space so that when you look from your window they can be seen and you can comment on their growth or looks during the year.
4. Use your loved one’s name every day. You can do this by choosing to talk to him every day, either silently or out loud, or you can tell others that you hope they will feel free to use the name and talk about the loved one when referring to them would be natural in a particular conversation.
5. At holidays, birthdays, summer cookouts, or birthdays find a way to symbolically recognize the presence of the loved one. Use a particular utensil when cooking; shows a special item belonging to the deceased; light a candle at home and/or in church; show something the person has made or painted; make a toast in which the person is mentioned by name or hang a particular ornament or object that characterizes the loved one.
6. Do something to continue the charitable interest your loved one had in a particular organization or cause. It could be things like preserving part of the environment, sponsoring a child in an orphanage, helping the homeless, or volunteering at a soup kitchen. You may also want to consider establishing a scholarship at a college or university.
7. Play your loved one’s favorite song or a song from their favorite entertainment or television show. It can also be useful to find music that was popular earlier in your life that can bring back old memories of you and your loved one.
8. On a birthday or another special day, ask your best friend to take a trip to a favorite place that you used to go with your loved one. While discussing the past and the memories that this visit evokes. When you are longer with reinvesting in life, you may want to make this journey by yourself, and choose to talk to your deceased loved one about the good times you had there.
9. Make a collage of photos of your loved one that can be framed and placed in your home and/or office. If you have a specific artistic talent (or you can hire someone) draw cartoons or symbols that illustrate the person’s interests, character or skills and include them in the collage. Include a sample of the deceased’s work, if appropriate.
10. Have a plaque made with your loved one’s name engraved on it with a favorite saying (yours or the one your loved one liked). Inform your local college or university, if you were associated with it, if they accept a bank donation for the campus with the name of your loved one. Or buy a bench and put it in your garden area or in a cemetery garden.
In short, the way you remember your loved one is only limited by your creativity. So take into consideration what you learned from your loved one, how he helped others, and how you feel he would like to be remembered. Ask others you trust for their input. Then decide how to keep your loved one’s memory alive by the tangible memories you create.
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