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Is Your Asperger’s Syndrome Teenager or Adult Becoming a Recluse?
We all know that adults with Asperger syndrome often aren’t very social…and this can be true despite years of therapy and treatment to improve social skills. But is your child at risk of becoming a recluse?
There are many teenagers and adults with Asperger’s who almost never leave the house for any reason. They can be on the computer a lot, play video games, or just watch TV. This is often the result of an intense amount of social anxiety.
Social anxiety
Several members of an Asperger syndrome message board said they were afraid to run into people they knew, or people from high school. And the fear of unexpected social situations creates so much panic and anxiety, that these young adults prefer to avoid people all together.
They are not confident in their social skills at all, and they have such a high anxiety to meet other people and have to talk to them, that they can’t even think of leaving their home, where they feel safe. What will they say if they meet someone?
So what can you do to reduce your child’s withdrawn behaviors?
- Try to identify the cause of the behavior. What is it about the outside world that your child fears? What could ease his anxiety? Since social anxiety is so often a cause, you may want to try to play the common interactions that your child might have with others in the outside world. Antidepressant medication could help decrease anxiety, as well as therapy, if you can get your child to go.
- Family dinners every day. If you haven’t already, implement family dinners every day so that your family can have the opportunity to check in with each other and foster a sense of connection. Also, being able to talk informally in a safe environment allows your Asperger’s loved one to practice the ins and outs of social interaction…and learn how to simply hold a conversation.
- Plan low key family outings on a regular basis. Go to a restaurant, a movie, a hike in a nature reserve. Try not to do anything too overwhelming; you need to keep your child’s sensory issues in mind.
- Have them go with you when you run errands if possible; if you have to bribe them with offers to buy them something small if it comes out, so be it. You want them to get used to it and become more comfortable going out in public…and dealing with the people they might meet.
The older your child is, obviously the more difficult this will be, especially for older children. The truth is, when push comes to shove, there isn’t much you can do to make your child less reclusive. This must be a choice that he or she makes for themselves. (And some adults with Asperger’s have to grow up after a certain period of time).
The important thing is to try to maintain connections with your child, because they know that they always have someone to go to. Reclusive behavior is not always a bad thing; all that time spent on the computer could be your child socializing online, in its own way. If their needs are met, this is not necessarily a problem. But if you are worried that your Asperger child will become a recluse, the above mentioned tips can help you work on it.
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